Those who have had conversations about life with me know that my adult life is characterized by not knowing whats next and following God’s call to do whatever he wants me to do. This past year and a half is testament to that exact reality. I never thought that I would be living in Haiti for the first (years ago) nine months, much less for two years. But, such is life when you follow the supreme God.
It hasn’t always been easy, in fact it never is. Every time God calls me to do something, I don’t want to do it. I either don’t want the responsibility or I just don’t like the idea, etc. I come up with excuse after excuse thought after thought of why I’m not qualified/not interested/etc. Even committing to FFP in Haiti this time was a hard decision; I’m selfish, I didn’t want to leave the States. My job was great, my friends are better, and my family is better still. Anyway, that happened and here I am, living out God’s call in my life until the beginning of October when I feel my call here will be completed.
These past 12 days have been amazing. I had a bunch of time to hang out with and get to know my sister Fania over that time and needless to say it was wonderful. I loved getting to know her and talking to her about life, racism, being blessed, privilege, and what we both want for our futures. She has become close to my heart in such a small amount of time! I am amazed at what God did to bring us close in a grand total of less than 30 days (this includes the week Adam and I spent in the DR in 2013). I felt called to minister to her while I was there by giving her counsel for her life and also just being nice and generous towards her. As I had mentioned before, she is such a resilient woman who has had it very hard her whole life, and I was honored to help her out in any way possible.
Along with having a good time with the staff, I felt like God doubled my future choices.. which I wasn’t expecting.. This is reason to pray even more about what He wants me to do after I’m done in Haiti because I felt a little overwhelmed when I first realized what He was speaking to me. I need to be in serious prayer about my future as it is all clouds and blurry shapes and I don’t have too much time left to choose. And again I don’t know what will come next; that’s kinda the point of this blog post. I have a plan of what I would like to happen, but in my experience that doesn’t usually come to pass. Something far greater comes crashing into the picture and I go left instead of right. Well my friends, I ask that you pray for avni mwen, my future; that I would be open to what God wants from me and not be selfish in my choices. Like I said, there are things I would like to do, but God can either confirm or deny those things in his ultimate knowledge of what’s best for me.
In other news, my mom is coming on Tuesday and spending 5 days here!! I’m so excited to have her visit and spend time with her.
That’s all for now folks,
Here’s to (the future)